Why do we go to church? Is it because we have to? Have we been taught, even without it being intended, that when we don't go to church we are sinning or displeasing God?
And what is church? Is it the building I attend each week or is it more? Is it something I have to do on a set day each week?
I challenged a parent several years ago, asking the question, "Why do you go to church?" The response I got was "so our children get into the habit of going." I know that there was probably more to the answer than that...at least I hope. But it really stuck with me. Is this all that church is about? Has it just become a habit? Something we do each week because it's tradition? Do we ever think of why we go or do we just go? Or is it something more?
Maybe a more telling question is, Do we feel guilty when we don't go? (We have to be careful here that what we are feeling is guilt and not the conviction of the Holy Spirit...there is a difference.)
I have struggled with this question for a long time and in the course of the last months have felt myself walking through this quite thoroughly. I have had to search my own heart and find out the truth about what I believe and get rid of the guilt that tradition and legalism (even when unintended) have placed on this area of my life.
I grew up, "getting into the habit" of going to church. My parents took me each week, seldom missing, especially if we didn't have a good reason. It was okay to miss if we were on holidays and sometimes we had to leave early. But attending church was a priority. We learned to be respectful and we learned how to sit still and quiet even when we were bored. And of course, I learned all about God and the stories in the bible. As an adult, I have continued with attending church each weekend.
Missing only when I was away or sick. And often feeling guilty if we
missed too many times in a row.
I recently heard a message on Hebrews 10:23-25 which says...
23 Let us hold unswervingly to the hope we profess, for he who promised is faithful. 24 And let us consider how we may spur one another on toward love and good deeds, 25 not giving up meeting together, as some are in the habit of doing, but encouraging one another—and all the more as you see the Day approaching.
Part of the message was that we MUST attend church on Sunday's. To the point that it is sin (or verges on sin) when we don't attend. Honestly, I myself have in the past found myself judging others for NOT going to church, when the truth of it is that I have no idea whether they are or are not meeting together with other believers. Church is not the building we attend each week on Sunday, it's what we are a part of as a believer in Christ. And there are many ways that could look. We need to be with other believers regularly to be able to "spur one another on toward love and good deeds" but does Sunday morning church really do that? Maybe yours does, but I tend to think that the "spurring each other on" happens more in our closer friendship than it does with a large congregation. There are many benefits that a larger church body brings but the accountability, the encouragement, does not generally come from acquaintances that we have in a larger church. Attending church however, does give us a chance to meet people of like minds which in turn, may help us find those who may be able to play that role in our lives.
I believe that we need to be in regular company of other believers where we can worship and serve God together. This can look many different ways but can and should NOT be limited to Sunday morning church.
Here is an article that I found cleared up some of the confusion around this verse that is so often used to convince people that they have to be in church Sunday morning...
http://www.wordofhisgrace.org/hebrews1025.htm
This last year has brought some
difficult times into our life and we have found ourselves in a position
where we are looking for a different church to attend. Honestly, I have
felt a bit lost. We have attended at this church for most of our lives
(well my husband for his whole life and me for a good portion) and
leaving has not been easy. Mostly because it was so very comfortable. We are both
still very involved in bible study groups as well as a LifeGroup, so
we are far from being cut off from fellow believers. But I have really
had to work through why I feel guilty about not attending church on a
regular basis. We have attended a few different places over the course
of the winter, we have done some Home Church with our children (which
they have loved) and we have had lots of weekends where we have been
busy with hockey (we have never had a year where hockey conflicted so
often, and I wonder, maybe, if that was God's way of giving me a break
from the pressure/guilt that I have been feeling about going to church
on Sunday and to give myself time to heal). In fact, in a lot of ways, my walk with God has been deeper
and more fulfilling than ever before. I have been forced to walk
beside the only one who can provide me with all the love and acceptance
that I need. We have had so many opportunities as a family to talk
about God and how he wants us to live. We have had more discussions
about the bible than ever before. And so, it's obviously not church on
Sunday's that does that.
Please don't hear me saying that I don't believe in attending church. But I have started to believe that we place such a high value on our church attendance and getting our kids to Sunday School that we forget to talk, live and breath our faith during the week as a family and with our friends. It's not the churches job to teach my kids about God, it's mine...but I found myself not worried about my kids cause they were learning in Sunday School each week. Many churches have even taken to not having the kids in the services at
all. And honestly, when my kids were little, I so often felt like
there was no point in being in church. It was nice when I could drop
them off and attend church in peace. But what does that really say? I
believe, to some degree, we are saying that they just get in the way of
our walk with God and we need to get them out of that way, rather than
picking them up and walking side by side with them. Showing them what
it means to worship and fellowship together. Jesus, placed such a high
value on children and he condemned the disciples for shooing the kids
away. If I want them to have a deep faith in God, it's not going to come from the 40 minutes they spend with a teacher each week. It's going to have to come from somewhere else. They need to hear the words from my mouth and see me living out those same words each day. It's not good enough to tell them to go to church on Sunday if we just go because we have to. It's not good enough to tell them to do their devotions if they never see us reading the bible on our own.
To sacrifice home worship to public worship is a most evil course of
action. Morning and evening devotion in a little home is infinitely more
pleasing in the sight of God than all the cathedral pomp which delights
the carnal eye and ear. Every truly Christian household is a church, and
as such it is competent for the discharge of any function of divine
worship, whatever it may be. Are we not all priests? Why do we need to
call in others to make devotion a performance? Let every man be a priest
in his own house. Are you not all kings if you love the Lord? Then make
your houses palaces of joy and temples of holiness. One reason why the
early church had such a blessing was because her members had such homes.
When we are like them we will have “added to the church those who were
being saved.”
Charles Spurgeon
It's been a difficult road for me so see that sometimes, we need to, and it's okay to, step back from the traditions in our lives and to take time to reflect and heal. And so, we continue on this path we have been placed on. Worshiping together with other believers in our lives as regularly as we can. Letting our hearts heal and grow. Learning to live each day in a way that glorifies God and is an example to our children and not being tied down by the baggage of guilt and legalism. Using the moments that our lives bring to teach about God's goodness and grace.
Here are a few more articles that address Hebrews 10:25 if you are interested in reading them...
http://www.truthortradition.com/modules.php?name=News&file=article&sid=1376
http://www.wordofhisgrace.org/housechurchspurgeon.htm
